elektra complex , previously titled thyme/thistle

i am aware my father loves me.

i know he loves me. sometimes he even says it when he's drunk and smells of beer and reaches out and hugs me through my old pyjamas and says "i love you, lide". And I agree. 

My father can love me in he mornings, at lunchtime and in the afternoons. my father can love me when he tells me jokes, when he feeds the cats and when we watch movies.

It's hard for my father to love me at night. 

My father can hate me. but he doesn't. and when he does, he can hide it very well. I can almost never tell. out of all the girls and boys in the world, I am his favourite. 

My father loves me, and he tells me that I am like him. I am like him, and like him, I attract crazy people.

My father loves me and I better not take it for granted.